When your marriage storms the only shelter is surrender…

GREEN House 1

GREEN House 2

Choosing us. Over and over. No matter what.

Just he and me, like you and him, against the world.

Us in Him, the One who lives to intercede, overcoming the world. And that includes worldliness raging rampant in us.

But about the fights and quarrels that exist among you—where do you suppose they come from? Can’t you see that they arise from conflicting passions within yourselves? You crave for something and don’t get it, you are jealous and envious of what others have got and you don’t possess it yourselves. Consequently in your exasperated frustration you struggle and fight with one another. You don’t get what you want because you don’t ask God for it. And when you do ask he doesn’t give it to you, for you ask in quite the wrong spirit—you only want to satisfy your own desires.
James 4:1-3

Even though marriages rumble and the world swirls the kingdom comes.

And the King wants to rule hearts so that never-failing love won’t be lost in marital misery.

We vow for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, in poverty and wealth.

And then wonder when worse shows up. Maybe it’s just the worst in us showing off?

We forget how we complained and cried about being single.

We fail to realize that our selfishness helped create the mess in our marriage.

Or that when we married we began a great and holy journey that is sometimes full of hard which God uses to soften our hearts.

And every step to the altar of marital sacrifice is a path to our own Calvary illuminating only the next step of obedience, not where we may or may not be in our marriage next month or next year.

This is the way walk ye in it, my daughter. Just for today. One day at a time. And soon a new path forged. Trust Me.

But a wife may resent being the one that reaches out for help as the marriage flounders and husband-faults seem to flourish.

Think of it this way: why not you?

And why not choose to see your husband as Christ sees him remembering how much God has forgiven you? No matter what it feels like when you fight, your husband is not the enemy.

For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.
Ephesians 6:12

And the marriage crucible can burn away your bad.

But now, put all these things behind you. No more evil temper or furious rage; no more malice, insults or shouted abuse! No evil thoughts or words about others, no more evil thoughts or words about God, and no more filthy conversation. Don’t tell each other lies any more, for you have finished with the old man and all he did and have begun life as the new man, who is out to learn what he ought to be, according to the plan of God.
Colossians 3:8-10

Are you out to learn what you ought to be?

Does your heart long to be the woman God plans for you to become? To learn to live the way of Love ?

He has by his own action given us everything that is necessary for living the truly good life, in allowing us to know the one who has called us to him, through his own glorious goodness.
2 Peter 1:3

Do you know the One? Really?

Or do you just know about Him all that you have learned in church and Sunday School or what others have told you about God?

GREEN House walk

Will you seek Him now as never before? Perhaps reading the gospels as if you know nothing about God and discovering Him all over again. Or maybe for the first real time.

And falling in love with Him.

If so don’t waste another moment. Start a new relationship with Him and spend together lots of time.

Surrendered. Letting go. Exhaling. Humbling at His feet, kissing them in gratitude.

And God using the better and the worse in marriage will teach you to love and to understand how great is the Father’s love that His only Son came to die painful in your place and mine that we might be called His kids.

His kids! Precious to His heart. No longer orphans left alone but wanted.

And instead of counting to ten as you blow off more self-righteous steam count the ways He loves you.

Cost of His priceless gift helping you see your internal poverty with a renewed willingness to obey Him.

Maybe that means right now you click off your computer and open your Bible. Fall on your face and seek Him, repenting.

All these things added — like peace, joy and love.

And you.

Rescued at last…

~sheila
All our longings end in love

 

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22 thoughts on “When your marriage storms the only shelter is surrender…

  1. Beautiful pics.
    As I read your post Eph 4;32 came to mind (seems to be theme for me today, something God is almost shouting at me).
    Forgiveness, tenderhearted love. Only in Christ can I love anyone, even self or spouse, like that.
    I am so thankful God is patient and has given me a patient spouse to have and to hold until death do us part.

    • See my reply to Hazel, TC. Each day we pick up His cross to follow, not lead, laying down self and sin and choosing the High Road. And sometimes it hurts…our pride, our ego, etc. But we CAN DO ALL THROUGH CHRIST. Blessings and prayers, my friend. PS Will get you that copy of Heart Cry soon. Tnx 🙂

  2. Thank you for your wise words shared here with us at “Tell Me a Story.” I wonder how we would behave, speak and listen if it were Jesus standing there instead of our mate. Courtesy is the key to a quiet home and our relationship with Jesus (as you said) is the most important fact in a good marriage.

    • And ya know, Hazel, JESUS is standing there in our marriages yet we so often overlook that truth and act all ugly to our spouses forgetting how deeply we grieve the Holy Spirit. May we all be more mindful of this and may His great love for us melt our hearts so that they want to obey Him and love Him and others well. Thanks.

    • And that is the quest I have been on in the last almost three years…to REALLY KNOW JESUS in a way different from all the stuff I have learned ABOUT Him. It literally transforms our lives, Laura. Blessings always…

  3. So much passion and intention in your writing Sheila! I love this post. Just what I needed to read this morning 🙂

  4. We have a plaque in our home that reads in part…Jesus is the silent listener to every conversation, the unseen guest at every meal…Good to remind ourselves and treat each other as if … which it is. Whatever you do to the least of these brethren of mine, He said. Thanks, Dorothy.

  5. I loved this post. I’m your neighbor at Barbie’s. Thanks for stopping by my place as well. I just started reading the book Love Dare and I’m actually blogging my way through this journey. It is truly speaking to me on choosing God’s kind of love and what an impact I can see it having on my marriage already. Thank you for this beautiful message. Blessings to you.

    • Thank you, Beth, for returning the visit 🙂 and for your kind words. YES, Jesus LOVE is the answer to all our relationships and is something that I keep pursuing with my Michael in our marriage and with others. Reading the Gospel of John over and over for a month a few years back, then reading the other gospels, and asking the Holy Spirit to teach me about our Lord as revealed by Jesus — as if I had never ever learned anything about Him from church, or books or others — is allowing me to really KNOW God and His love in a completely new way, a better way…and this journey continues but it has and is transforming my life. Blessings to you and prayers for your husband so far away…

  6. These are such great Bible passages for couples to focus on–especially when the storms of life rage, Sheila. And we all go through so many stormy times in life and marriage–no one is immune or gets a “pass.” I do so love your exhortations to couples, and in particular women, that really puts these biblical truths into practice and gives us “handles” for working together and being for each other in marriage. Thanks so much for being a mentor to us all! *Hugs*

  7. This was so powerful and I long to truly know Jesus and His endless love for me. Visiting you from Barbie’s!!!

    • That is my heart’s desire, too, Mary. To KNOW HIM not just know ABOUT Him. If you read my comment to Beth below you will see how focusing first on the four gospels as if I had never heard a word about God is transforming how I love and bringing me closer and closer to Him. Thanks again for commenting. Always good to see your smiling face, friend. Blessings to you as our great Lord of Love takes you to the High Places of Love…