Love in marriage heals old war wounds…Day 4 of First comes Love series


We got up with the cows that morning a year ago as a full moon lingered low on the horizon.

And a hush in the distance started rumbling, growing louder as we tried to pull the covers over an issue that was beginning to crawl like bed bugs all over us.

Loving tussle ensued.

No shouting or storming about just raw, honest communication from two hearts hurt over the years as they each searched for love.

Realizing later than sooner that Love had been waiting during the time of twisting and turning, the two of us unable to lie still and sleep in peace, hearts divided wide and awake with pain.

Self on the throne.

And even after ultimate healing through relationship with the One and Only who loves us truly, madly, deeply, there are scars, and even a few wounds oozing.

Wounds buried just below the surface in the dailyness that preoccupies.

Wounds worn behind masks.

Wounds crying silently to be healed completely.

Wounds that we each and all bear as a result of life fallen on earth.

Wounds that can tear us down and tear us apart.

Until the healing balm of Love is applied, time and again, for as long as it takes, for as long as we both shall live.

Young Marrieds  2

And in the crucible known as Love in marriage, the heat is turned up just enough to make hardened hearts melt, cause a part of the Body to squirm outside it’s comfort zone, allow the remaining dross to be burnt away with purifying fire and healing to come as we grow in marital oneness.

And as we grow through, by and in Love, we can be used all the better, fulfilling the purpose, hearts’ desire satisfied.

But it has hurt…

And this is where my Michael and me found ourselves that lovely full moon morning. The morning that didn’t seem lovely at all as we tip toed and tumbled through the early hours.

But when it was all over, we knew that business had been transacted in the heavenlies. And we gave ourselves a gold star for having passed the test {unlike some other times when one or both of us have failed miserably}. Literally, a big gold star on the calendar to mark this day as a Jordan stone for what God had done for us.

And we rejoiced with the Father that in our vulnerable hearts torn asunder more than once in the past, there has been a new knitting together, making two hearts a viable whole.

Tight weave.

A whole worthy of reflecting the glory of the Father. The Father who loves us so much that sometimes He lets us hurt…

Tears flowing during prayers afterward as we showered in the cleansing blood of the Lamb. Washed clean and sparkling, more equipped and ready for service to the King than ever before.

And just like the dawn that breaks crystal clear after a heavy rain storm, our hearts were gifted with clarity unknown before that morning. Seeing, we could see clearly again how much we have to celebrate in our oneness in the One.

Rejoicing along the way of our journey here on earth. On days good and not so good. Days that flow easily and days that rub hard. Day in and day out, one day at a time.

Trusting that He will always supply the grace, and mercies new each morning.


And celebrate we did, though tired from the morning’s lesson.  To quote a good friend of ours, “conflict resolved breeds intimacy” of the sweetest kind in marriage.

Granted rest in a second snooze, God woke us up to a new level of covenant love. Together we praised the Father for his magnificent grace in allowing us to rise up more than conquerors.

Over self, sin and satan.

Especially in marriage, where powers of darkness work overtime to tear down what God has joined.

One man united with one woman as a one flesh force against the powers of hell is like a duck sitting as it mirrors Christ and His church — His body, His bride.

So we must ever be alert and battle ready, swords drawn and armor on. Enemy, though limited, seeks to destroy, crush and kill us. Or at least kill the gift of love — a treasure to be guarded — that brings to life all that is good and Godly in this dreary wasteland, one time Garden.

And when you’ve given more ground to the enemy than you care to remember, as we both have, and when you are on the other side of 50, as we both are, and if your hearts are willing, Yes! Yes!, you earn the gift of greater wisdom, wisdom to share.

The spoils of war, the bounty after battle…

There is NO force more powerful in the universe than LOVE.

LOVE has a name, JESUS.

LOVE died that we might live heart-new lives on earth and spend eternity in His Presence.

LOVE endured tremendous pain that our wounds might be healed.

LOVE covers over all of our stuff.

As little children let us come to His table, not to eat crumbs cast off, but to taste of all that is good. To feast full of Love, pushing back from the table nourished, refreshed, rejuvenated.

Continuing along the Way, like you, we’ll face struggles on another day. But He will provide the grace to stand. Struggles survived bringing healing and hope.

Hope found only in Love.

Love that wraps His arms around us, like He did for us that moonlight morning, drawing us closer to Him and each other.

Comforting us with a peace that is Jehovah-Shalom…


Today’s post is Day 4 in a #31days series called First comes Love…

All the posts in the series can be found here. And so you don’t miss a single one, please subscribe here.

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Moon Photo by Kathy Welch

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13 thoughts on “Love in marriage heals old war wounds…Day 4 of First comes Love series

  1. Dear Sheila
    Oh, you have described it so well; LOVE covers our stuff. Or as it is written in the Bible; LOVE covers many sins. What a joyful day it will be when we learn to receive grace upon grace to look beyond one another’s sins and weaknesses and to see the person Jesus loves so incredibly much. That takes a whole set of new “eyes”.
    Blessings and love to Michael XX

  2. Hi Sheila. Thank you for posting this! It is beautifully written!

    I found your post on the Weekends are Fun link-up.

  3. Beautiful post full of so much hope and encouragement!

    Thanks for sharing at Essential Fridays.


    Mel from Essential Thing Devotions

  4. I’m seeing more and more Christian couples (married) being torn apart by satan. Married Christians have a big target on them- satan doesn’t like to see Godly unions.

    Thanks for these encouraging words.